BREAKING OUT OF JAIL by Terry L. Sumerlin

One of the fringe benefits of doing “enrichment lectures” for Princess Cruises is that, at various times, Sherry and each of our children have accompanied me. We’ve had wonderful times together.

Once, when our youngest daughter, Amanda, was with me she asked a question that has sort of stuck with me. The conversation took place some years ago but, if my memory serves me correctly, it took place while we were having breakfast in the beautiful Horizon Court of the Sun Princess. She suddenly asked, “Dad, do you feel old?”

I was so taken back, all I could say was, “WHAT DO YOU MEAN ‘Do I feel old?’” “Well, you are getting up there,” she replied. Of course, to someone who at the time was in her early twenties I guess everyone over thirty was “getting up there.”

The thought was planted, though. Somewhat like the golfer whose friend asked on the tee box, “Do you inhale or exhale at the top of your swing?”, her question pops into my mind at odd moments. Recently, I thought of it while writhing in pain. It all started innocently enough, while I was at Mom’s house tending to her dog, while she was in the hospital.

I’m never quite sure if her chow is going to lick me or devour me. Normally, when feeding him, I open the sliding glass door just enough to permit me to stand in the opening and drop his food in the dish. That way he doesn’t slip through the door and into the living room. This particular day, I had to go completely outside to check his water bowl at the back of the house. When I returned to the door – surprise! I’d locked myself out! The key I had would not unlock that door, and there was a pad lock on the gate to the fence. I was in jail!

Figuring that no one I could call on the cell phone would be able unlock the gate, I began to plan my escape. It would be a simple matter of climbing on top the dog house and then to the top of the six foot privacy fence. From there I would leap to the ground.

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BIO:

Terry L. Sumerlin, known as the Barber-osopher, is the author of "Barber-osophy," and is a columnist for the San Antonio Business Journal. He speaks nationally as a humorist/motivational speaker. Visit his website at www.Barber-osophy.com.

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